The Halfway House

By Caffeinated
Tue Mar 31 2009
8:56 pm
in Television

What happens when you mix medical drama with a first person shooter while constantly racking the focus in and out, then have Mos Def narrate for an hour?  You get last night’s episode, “Locked In”; quite possibly the worst episode of House in the show’s five season run.

There was nothing particularly bad with the story at hand.  A man appears to be brain-dead, but is actually conscious of everything that is happening.  With virtually no means of communication, the Houseketeers must solve the mystery before all consciousness is lost. 

This sounds like a pretty solid case for Doctor Gregory House.  Go down a few wrong paths (lupus, cancer, etc…) then finally have a Scooby-Doo ending where the real culprit is revealed with a snarky remark.  Learn a little something about life along the way, and threaten to fire someone in the process.  That’s what I call a Monday night.  But this time I couldn’t help but feel that the director had been watching a bit too much Michel Gondry.  From the imaginary beach scenes, to the hazy POV that made up most of the episode, all the way to casting Mos Def (of Gondry’s “Be Kind, Rewind”), it all added up to make for an atypically awful episode.

While this sounds pretty damning of the director, I’m guessing that most of the blame lays at the feet of bitchy fans (self included).  The director, Dan Attias, is one of the most capable directors currently working in TV.  His resume reads like a must-see list.  From Lost, to The Wire, Always Sunny to Entourage, Big Love to The Sopranos.  He’s done it all.  It’s hard to fault someone with a track record like that. 

The only conclusion I can logically reach is that the show’s producers are responding to complaints that the formula never changes.  While I applaud their intentions (if this is indeed the intention), I can’t applaud the method.  This was a gimmick episode, and will be remembered (or forgotten) as such.  Not only was it incredibly annoying to watch, like a youtube video from a camera with broken auto-focus, but it detracted from the mystery.  From the moment the episode starts, we know that Mos Def is okay inside his own head.  There is no question that he might be brain dead.  I don’t want to relate to the injured dude.  I want to relate to the characters that I’ve invested hours of my life into.  I want to feel the uncertainty they feel.  Their frustrations.  Not those of a character who, one way or another, will be gone by the end of the episode. 

On top of all of this, House crashed his motorcycle and we didn’t even get to see it happen.  The episode starts post-crash.  I’ve been waiting 3 years to see House crash that damn motorcycle.  It finally happens (off screen?!?) and no one even seems to ask if House has a medical issue that caused him to crash.  Couldn’t it at least have been the cliffhanger from the previous episode? 

Was this the final straw?  My last episode of House M.D.?  Of course not.  It’s an interesting show with great characters and dialogue.  I even give them a lot of credit for significant past change-ups (anyone remember when they recast the entire team of Houseketeers?).  For a show like this, maybe the formula works.  It’s like that one kid in third grade that always picked Bo Jackson in NES Tecmo Bowl.  Sure, he was predictable, but damned if he didn’t kick your ass up and down the field.